Should I? Sex during pregnancy

Sex when pregnant can be better then ever before for some women

Although many women worry about having sex once they discover they're expecting, there is normally no need to abstain at any stage of the pregnancy.

These are questions that most women ask when they find out they are pregnant: Is sex still possible, or even a good idea? Am I still desirable? It's normal and healthy to wonder about these things–after all, you're now responsible for two lives instead of just one. The good news is, for most women, sex during pregnancy is perfectly safe. In fact, sex during pregnancy can be even better than before!

Better and better

Many women report that their sex drive or libido actually increases while they are pregnant. And this is a good time for sex! You no longer have to worry about birth control, and you (and your significant other) may find your body even sexier than before you got pregnant. Some women even report that sex during pregnancy is the best they've ever had. This is usually because of increased blood flow to the pelvic area, or because these women are finally able to just relax and let themselves enjoy sex without worrying about conception or contraception. So let yourself relax and have a good time!

What if I don't feel like having sex?

This is also perfectly normal. There are many reasons why some women have less interest in sex, including the following:

• A feeling of fullness after having sex, due to the increased blood flow to the pelvic area
• Abdominal cramping during or after sex
• Nausea, usually during the first trimester
• Psychological issues (e.g. body image issues as the baby grows)
• Fatigue

If you're worried that your libido has decreased, or if you're unhappy with the way your body looks, talk with your doctor. He or she may be able to suggest ways you can be more comfortable or share intimacy with your partner.

Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't!

It's also normal for your libido to change during your pregnancy. You may have increased desire for sex during your second trimester, but have no interest at all during your third trimester. During your third trimester, you may feel uncomfortable in general and especially during sex. Talk with your partner about how you feel. Keeping communication lines open during this time is the best way to ensure a happy, healthy pregnancy.

The physics of sex during pregnancy

There's no mistaking it–your body is getting bigger every day. And that can make sex tricky. The good old "missionary position" probably won't be possible once your stomach is big enough. However, there are positions you can try in which your belly won't get in the way, including the following:

• Lie partly on your side. This allows your partner to keep his weight off your uterus.
• Try using the bed to your advantage. Lay on the side or at the foot of the bed with your legs and feet propped on the edge. Your partner can kneel or stand in front of you.
• Try the spoon position. Lying side-by-side allows for shallower penetration, avoiding deeper thrusts that can become uncomfortable later in pregnancy.
• Try it with you on top. This takes the weight off your abdomen and gives you more control over the depth of penetration.
• Have your partner sit on a sturdy chair while you sit on his lap. Again, this takes the weight off your uterus.

Caring for your baby

During normal pregnancies (pregnancies with low risk for complications), sex cannot and will not harm your baby. The baby is safe inside the uterus and will not be harmed by sexual relations. Your partner's penis will not come into contact with your baby during sex. It's also important to know that, in normal pregnancies, intercourse and orgasm will not cause miscarriage or contractions. However, some doctors recommend that women stop having sex during the final few weeks of pregnancy. This is a safety precaution because semen contains a chemical that may stimulate contractions. Stimulating your breasts may also speed up the production of oxytocin, which can cause contractions when you are close to your due date.

Enjoy yourself!

The most important thing to remember about sex during pregnancy is that, for most women, it is safe and healthy. Talk with your doctor to make sure there are no complications that might make sex more dangerous for you and your baby. If your pregnancy is normal, enjoy this time to be close to your partner.